I'm in England, being Best Man at my friend's wedding, and there is nothing more intimidating than having to give a Best Man's speech. Plenty of my friends in the audience have done so before, and done so very well, so expectations are high. I have plenty of material, but I've been slapped with a strict non-disclosure order on certain prior events by the bride - so no jokes about overlapping relationships, or anything else remotely scandalous, sadly. Besides, there's plenty of work to be done apart from speaking, but that speech looms large as the Thing That Must Be Done, Done Right, and Right At The End. So I bought the books on how to do it - and they're simply awful. Then I found some great advice in The Oxford Union Guide to Successful Public Speaking:
(1) The Best Man's speech is the easiest speech you'll ever have to give: the audience want you to succeed, and they're drunk - you can't ask for more from them. Most likely, you're on after the boring gushing Father of the Bride speech, so you're not even first, and the audience will laugh at any light relief after that.
(2) Forget all the stupid books on one-liners and sample speeches - they are of no use. You do have plenty of material on the person in question - you're most likely known them for a long time - so carry a small notepad with you and the stories will come to you. (You should also poll the guest list for more - they'll be keen to help too.)
(3) Shorter is better - if all else fails, all you really have to do is say something nice about the Bride and Groom, tell a quick story about his past, give the standard thank-yous, read out any telegrams if there are any, and finally toast your friend and his new wife. It's really not that hard - so relax, speak slowly and clearly, use little notecards with cue words and key phrases on - they really help, don't drink too much beforehand, but catch up immediately afterwards!
These simple guidelines worked well for me - except for the anecdote about the amazing girl I met - but that's another story...
Posted by ashleyniblock at November 02, 2002 10:32 AM